How porn ruined sex

At the risk of being declared hopelessly lame and old fashioned by some of my you, let me share this article from jezebel.com which so nicely sums up something I've thought for a while. I'm not going to post the text here, just the link, because I don't want someone to read it (hi mom!) that wasn't planning on reading a graphic discussion of these things while they sip their morning coffee. Having given that disclaimer, seriously, check it out here.

In short, the article talks about how relationships today are increasingly shaped by media images of what relationships (and sex) are supposed to be like. Young men today have access to more porn, and more graphic porn, and at a younger age, since it's only a web search away rather than limited to what dad's got hidden under his bed as in days of yore. While I am not of the camp that wants porn abolished (I know that plenty of women, as well as men, look at and enjoy porn and that the content varies widely), I do think it is problematic when it is made only from a male perspective [specifically, a misogynist male perspective where the degradation/humiliation of women is a key element] and is the primary teacher about what sex is or should be. One woman's comment to the above article cites a Naomi Wolf quote that struck me as so spot-on: "Today, real naked women are just bad porn."

I think people should be able to do whatever they're into. I mean, this is supposed to be fun, right?! But it seems there are guys out there expecting almost to be entertained, like "What can you come up with that's new?" without regard to whether the woman in question is into it. (Also, how often is it "I've got this freaky new way I'd like to please you, my super hot real female partner" as opposed to "Hey, I wonder if you could wax, put this on, and we could stick this here...?" I'd be surprised to hear of a guy so much as buying special boxers in an attempt to look hot for his girl.) I imagine these same guys are then baffled when their partner isn't squealing with delight the whole time. Because, I mean, the girls in Barely Legal Big Booty Cheerleader Hoes From Hell totally loved it! And porn is totally representative of reality and depicts genuine female desires and pleasure...I mean, the vast majority of women begin writhing and moaning upon entry and get off in 12 seconds, just like they are likely to proposition the pizza delivery guy and assorted repair men. Totally.

I'm not necessarily blaming these guys, I mean, sure it's a choice to look at porn and specifically to look at certain kinds of porn, but there also seems to be something else at play (what it is, I don't know) that keeps continually raising the freaky-deaky bar so that in order to get attention something has to be more extreme, more violent, more bizarre, whatever. Who knows, maybe the natural result of this progression is going to be this freaky sex backlash, where people are going to get so bored with their ball gags and six-ways and poop and whatever that vanilla sex will become revolutionary. I dunno.

Oh, and one last thing: while most of the comments to the Jezebel post are hilarious and worth checking out, one personal favorite is:
"If anyone needs a reason to bat for Team Muff, this is it."